100 Toilet Paper Jokes to Keep You Laughing All Week

Welcome to the ultimate collection of toilet paper humor—100 Toilet Paper Jokes to Keep You Laughing All Week! In a world where the news can be less than refreshing, it’s necessary to have a go-to source for a good chuckle, and what better way to lighten the mood than with a subject as universally relatable as toilet paper? From the moment it became a hot commodity, toilet paper has been on a roll, sparking puns, jokes, and laughter across households everywhere.

In this blog, we unravel the wit wrapped around each roll with jokes that will have you giggling, chortling, and sharing with friends. These aren’t your run-of-the-mill one-liners; they are carefully crafted quips designed to lift your spirits on even the most mundane bathroom breaks. Whether you’re on the throne or just in need of some comic relief, these jokes are sure to wipe away the blues.

From the punny to the downright silly, there’s a joke here for everyone. And the best part? You don’t have to ration these laughs—there’s plenty to go around, with enough humor to last you the entire week. We’ve got everything covered: the twist, the fold, and the punchline, ensuring that your sense of humor never goes down the toilet.

So, let’s get rolling! Prepare to be bowled over by our compilation as we present to you a celebration of the most chucklesome and flush-worthy toilet paper jokes around. Keep this tab open, bookmark it for later, or print it out for emergency entertainment—you never know when you might need a good laugh to clear the air!

  1. Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? To get to the bottom.
  2. What do you call toilet paper with a high IQ? Smarty pants.
  3. Why was the toilet paper at the party? Because it knew how to party wipe!
  4. What’s a toilet paper’s favorite song? “Rolling in the Deep.”
  5. Why did the toilet paper cross the road? It was stuck to someone’s shoe.
  6. What do you call a detective toilet paper? Sherlock Bowls.
  7. Why don’t toilet papers ever win at poker? They always fold.
  8. What do you call it when toilet paper works together? Team wipe.
  9. Why did the toilet paper work out? To stay ripped.
  10. Why was the toilet paper always tired? It had too many sheets to deal with.
  11. What’s a toilet paper’s favorite dance? The twist and shout.
  12. Why did the toilet paper blush? It saw the toilet’s bottom.
  13. Why don’t secrets stay with toilet paper? Because it always unfolds.
  14. What did the toilet paper say to the other? “You’re tear-able.”
  15. Why did the toilet paper start writing? It wanted to express its innermost feelings.
  16. What do you call an optimistic toilet paper? A roll model.
  17. What did one sheet of toilet paper say to the other? “I feel wiped.”
  18. What do you call a toilet paper comedian? A rolling jokester.
  19. Why was the toilet paper so good at soccer? It had perfect roll control.
  20. Why did the toilet paper take a day off? It needed to unwind.
  21. Why was the toilet paper so good at math? It always had a number two pencil.
  22. How do you apologize in toilet paper language? “I re-roll-y am sorry!”
  23. Why did the toilet paper roll fail as a secret agent? It always left a paper trail.
  24. What’s a ghost’s favorite toilet paper? Boo-quets.
  25. Why did the toilet paper refuse to work for the newspaper? It didn’t want to be sheet news.
  26. What did the overused toilet paper complain about? Being on a roll too much.
  27. What’s a toilet paper’s life philosophy? What comes around, rolls around.
  28. Why was the toilet paper so stressed? It had too many loose ends.
  29. What did the toilet paper say to the flush? “You spin me right round.”
  30. Why did the toilet paper start a journal? To log its thoughts.
  31. Why was the toilet paper the star of the bowling team? It always struck out.
  32. How does toilet paper greet the other in France? “Bon roll!”
  33. What’s toilet paper’s favorite TV show? Game of Thrones.
  34. What do you call a fashionable toilet paper? The belle of the ball.
  35. Why was the toilet paper always broke? It kept rolling in the dough.
  36. Why did the toilet paper refuse to participate in the race? It couldn’t handle another wipeout.
  37. What’s a toilet paper’s worst fear? The end of the roll.
  38. What did the toilet paper say during the storm? “I’m on a roll!”
  39. Why was the toilet paper always the class clown? It loved to crack up.
  40. How does toilet paper express affection? With sheet hugs and kisses.
  41. Why did the toilet paper win an award? It wiped out the competition.
  42. Why did the toilet paper leave the party? It got too wrapped up in itself.
  43. What’s a pirate’s favorite toilet paper brand? Charrrrmin!
  44. Why was the toilet paper so convincing? It always got to the bottom of things.
  45. Why did the toilet paper start a fight? It wanted to roll with the punches.
  46. What’s the most flirtatious brand of toilet paper? “Come hither with Quilted Northern.”
  47. Why did the toilet paper meditate? To reach inner piece.
  48. What did the tree say to the toilet paper? “You’re the butt of all my jokes!”
  49. How did the toilet paper feel after the joke? Tearfully happy.
  50. Why did the roll of toilet paper go to school? To clean up in geography class.
  51. Why did the toilet paper fail at tennis? It couldn’t handle the backwipe.
  52. What do you call an adventurous toilet paper? Indiana Jones and the Temple of Loo.
  53. Why did the toilet paper start a diet? It wanted to reduce its waist size.
  54. How did the toilet paper get strong? By doing squat wipes.
  55. Why was the toilet paper philosopher famous? For its deep sheets of thought.
  56. What’s a toilet paper’s favorite sport? Bowling, for obvious roll reasons.
  57. Why was the toilet paper always cheerful? Because it knew how to roll with it.
  58. What did the toilet paper say to its child at bedtime? “Dream of the softest things.”
  59. Why did the toilet paper feel ignored? Because people kept tearing it apart.
  60. How does toilet paper introduce itself at a meeting? “I’m on a roll, let’s get this meeting rolling!”
  61. Why did the toilet paper start a gardening hobby? To go green!
  62. Why was the toilet paper in the orchestra? It had the best sheet music.
  63. What’s a toilet paper’s favorite day of the week? Roll-over Thursday.
  64. Why did the new toilet paper get promoted? It was on a roll.
  65. What’s a toilet paper’s least favorite season? Fall, when everyone leaves.
  66. Why did the toilet paper take a sick day? It was feeling flushed.
  67. What did the toilet paper say to the other in a race? “Let’s roll!”
  68. Why was the toilet paper always late? It got stuck in a crack.
  69. What’s a toilet paper’s favorite martial art? Tae Kwon Do.
  70. How does a toilet paper answer the phone? “Yellow, rolls speak!”
  71. What do you call toilet paper with a cold? A little stuffed up.
  72. Why did the toilet paper start a podcast? To wipe away silence.
  73. What did the toilet paper say to the bully? “You’re on a tear today!”
  74. How do you know when a toilet paper is in love? It gets all flushed.
  75. Why did the toilet paper start a space program? To explore Uranus.
  76. What’s a toilet paper’s favorite kind of story? A tear-jerker.
  77. Why was the toilet paper so good at history? It knew a lot about the past flushes of time.
  78. What do you call a toilet paper with a jet pack? The Rocket Roll.
  79. Why was the toilet paper always calm? It knew no mess was too big to handle.
  80. What’s a toilet paper’s favorite magic spell? “Wipe-us Clean-us!”
  81. Why was the toilet paper at the computer? It heard about data wipes.
  82. How did the toilet paper feel after a good joke? Re-rolled with laughter.
  83. Why did the toilet paper get lost in the woods? It took the wrong turn at the log.
  84. What did the toilet paper say to the wallpaper? “At least your job isn’t as crappy.”
  85. Why was the toilet paper at the job interview? It wanted a position with more paper benefits.
  86. Why did the toilet paper refuse to work overtime? It was tearing up over the pressure.
  87. What’s the toilet paper’s favorite horror movie? “The Rolling Dead.”
  88. How does toilet paper pray? “Deliver us from weevil.”
  89. Why did the toilet paper take up comedy? It was on a roll with puns.
  90. What did the toilet paper say to the lazy roll? “You gotta get moving, buddy!”
  91. What did the roll of toilet paper say about its creators? “They really made me what I am today.”
  92. Why was the toilet paper so good at jazz? It had a great swing and a cool roll.
  93. What do you call a toilet paper roll with ambitions? A goal-oriented wrapper.
  94. Why did the toilet paper avoid the sun? It didn’t want to be sun-dried.
  95. What do you call a toilet paper with a cut? A split roll.
  96. Why did the toilet paper start a blog? To share the ‘wipe’ of life.
  97. What did the toilet paper say to the hand dryer? “Blow off, I’ve got this covered!”
  98. Why did the toilet paper take art class? To learn about the fine art of layering.
  99. What did the toilet paper call its autobiography? “Life in the Fast Lane: A Roll’s Story.”
  100. Why did the roll of toilet paper turn down the promotion? It didn’t want to get wrapped up in work.

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Categories jokes

Written by Gabriel Cruz - Foodie, Animal Lover, Slang & Language Enthusiast